Tied up… or free again…
Long time no blogging, well, one month… but anyway my blogging “rhythm” has been pretty slow in the last months. Well not only blogging, also taking pictures and editing them, or making anything inside Second Life (i’ve been doing stuff, but not making stuff).
Soooo… here it comes one of those personal blogposts about thoughts, feelings, etc… confessions on a virtual world. 
In the last year everything started slowing down, don’t get me wrong, not sad about it, i just want to understand what happened, and sometimes the best way to understand is to try to explain. There are many possible reasons, first, i’m too self-demanding and often not happy with what i make. I took so many pictures and deleted them once edited, or wrote many blogposts or created many objects or builds and deleted them too only because i was not happy enough with them. When you have a period where you are not happy enough with most of the things you make you start to think that maybe you are good enough and after you deleted some number of things you wonder also if it worths it, the energy, passion and time invested. Then you just stop creating until you feel the need to do it again.
At the same time one feels sometimes like a slave of what one makes. You have to write blogposts, you have to take pictures, you have to do lots of other stuff and you have to live your life and meet friends and… and… and is not you have to meet your friends or live your life, is just you want to do it, but all together when you have a limited time becomes stressful because you feel tied, trapped, and at the same time you feel bad if you don’t do all you want to do… and i’m terrible organizing my time, he he he…
All this stress is because you want to please yourself… and at the same time please others too, but now i know i just have to please myself because is not possible to do it all at the same time for long. What i do and make in Second Life must not be a cage and that’s what changed exactly. All i want to do i’ll do it for myself, and i’m sure some others will like it… and some not, of course.
Oooof! I feel better now after saying all this! Thanks for listening-reading, finally it seems blog readers are the most patient listeners.
4 Responses to “Tied up… or free again…”
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*hugs you tight*
We all have moment like these
I feel the same way sometimes. It’s very hard when you work long on a project for everyone and it’s not recognized. It’s much happier to just make what you like and let the rest be extra.
I like your shirt, by the way.
Is good to know i’m not alone in this… well, with you, Gany, we talked about this some times.
And Thau, i think that’s the right angle. And, even is supposed to be a female tshirt.. i like it too.
I agree with the sentiment.. It seems I’ve noticed a 2-3 year “life curve” for many people in Second Life.. It takes about that long for them to begin getting restless and wanting to try something new.. either in their “real lives” or in some other digital incarnation.
I’m coming up on my 3rd Rezzday and have been feeling a bit disconnected for about the last year or so.
(((H)))